Mall Ninja Bullshit Quiz Results

Your answers have been processed by our deep learning AI deep thought machine learning neutral network of hamsters and we have the 100% accurate result below.

Your Mall Ninja Bullshit is:

I am the Lieutenant of a 3 man Rapid Tactical Force Team, in one of the nation's largest indoor retail shopping centers. I am currently receiving escalator assault training. I regularly deal with threats from drug dealers, serial killers, and shoplifters.

I am a Master of three martial arts including ninjitsu, which means I can wear the special boots to climb walls in case the escalator is broken. It is not my martial arts skills that make me so vital to the security of the mall, it is my tactical and strategic skills honed by years of intense on-site on the job training.

We are undervalued for our beneficial effect on society at large, for the urban and suburban shopping centers see 80% of the armed violence in this nation, and why don't the cops take care of it, because they are a bunch of wusses, and they are not man enough to put up with the danger and stress.

Happiness IS a warm gun!

You will get different questions each time you try the quiz so why not have another go?

Go Again Generator