Top 20 Marriage Jokes

Welcome to the top 20 marriage jokes.

The Top 20 Marriage Jokes List

These are the top 20 Marriage Jokes for 2024.

1. Marriage is like a deck of cards. In the beginning, all you need is two hearts and a diamond. By the end, you wish you had a club and a spade.
2. My wife told me to stop acting like a flamingo, so I had to put my foot down.
3. I told my wife she should embrace her mistakes. She gave me a hug.
4. A successful marriage requires falling in love many times, always with the same person.
5. How do you know when you've found your soulmate? When they understand your need for sleep more than they understand your need for conversation.
6. I told my wife she should embrace her mistakes. She gave me a hug.
7. I asked my wife if she ever fantasizes about me. She said yes, about me taking out the trash, mowing the lawn, and doing the dishes.
8. Why did the man put his money in the blender? He wanted to make liquid assets for his divorce.
9. Marriage is a relationship in which one person is always right and the other is the husband.
10. Marriage is like a deck of cards. In the beginning, all you need is two hearts and a diamond. By the end, you’re looking for a club and a spade.
11. Love is like a fart. If you have to force it, it’s probably crap.
12. Why did the man put his money in the blender? He wanted to make liquid assets for his divorce.
13. Why did the couple bring a ladder to their marriage? Because they heard the wedding vows were a high commitment!
14. My wife told me to stop acting like a flamingo, so I had to put my foot down.
15. Why did the couple bring a ladder to their marriage? Because they heard the wedding vows were a high commitment!
16. If a man opens a car door for his wife, you can be sure of one thing: either the car is new or the wife is.
17. Marriage is a relationship in which one person is always right and the other is the husband.
18. Marriage is a relationship in which one person is always right and the other is the husband.
19. "Why did the man put his money in the blender? He wanted to make liquid assets for his divorce."
20. Why did the man put his money in the blender? He wanted to make liquid assets for his divorce.

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