Top 100 Flat Earth Jokes
Welcome to the top 100 flat earth jokes.
The Top 100 Flat Earth Jokes List
These are the top 100 Flat Earth Jokes for 2024.
1. We staged an intervention with our flat-earther friend. He said he felt cornered.2. Whats the differerence between a flat earther and a knife? A knife has a point
3. Why are there no highly credited esteemed flat-earthers? Because flattery will get you nowhere.
4. A round earth fact to a flat-earther is… …like what thanksgiving is to a turkey
5. What do a kinky lawyer and a flat earther have in common? Pulling evidence out if their ass
6. A flat earther and a round earther were arguing When the flat earther realized he was losing the argument he starts walking away. The round earther faces the other direction and says "I'll see you around"
7. Why Don't We Have a Reality Show Where Flat Earthers Walk to the End of the Earth? Because that would be edgy
8. What's a flat-earther's least favorite gun? A revolver.
9. An anti-vax mom and a flat-earther dad were having a friendly chat with their neighbor The neighbor says, "Well I have to go but send my best wishes to the kids. Tell them I hope they can shoot for the moon." The mom rather embarrassed says, "I'm sorry... In our family we don't allow shots at the moon."
10. What do a flat-earther, a Nazi, and YOU have in common? They all get one vote.
11. A flat earther dies and goes to heaven. At the gates of heaven, St. Peter says to them, "Before you enter the gates of heaven, you may ask god one question." The flat earther asks, "God, is the earth flat?" God responds, "The earth is 100% a globe." The flat earther exclaims, "Holy crap! This conspiracy runs deeper than I thought!"
12. I used to be a Flat-Earther until I realized this The Earth can't be flat because my life keeps on going downhill.
13. Earth is flat! I mean, when was the last time you came across naturally carbonated ocean water?
14. We staged an intervention with our flat-earther friend. He said he felt cornered.
15. Why is it impossible for a flat Earther calculate the volume of the Earth? Because there is always a rounding error.
16. How do you get a flat-Earther to shut up? Just push 'em off the edge.
17. No, flat-earthers are right. The earth is supposed to be flat. Until they burried your mom beneath it.
18. A flat earther is shown a map of the world "Not only is this world flat as the map truly shows it to be but all the places and physical features are also fictional!" He says "Why do you think that?" Someone asks "Because in the key on the side it says everything is a legend."
19. We staged an intervention with our flat-earther friend. He said he felt cornered.
20. There is a new reality show where flat earthers try to travel to the edge of the world. Unfortunately the finale is not a cliff hanger.
21. I want to become a flat earther. But I heard that there is a learning curve.
22. A flat-earther dies and goes to heaven. He arrives in heaven and is met by Saint Peter at the pearly gates. "You’ve lived your life free from sin and because of this, we welcome you into heaven my child." Says Saint Peter. The flat-Earther breathes a sigh of relief and starts to make his way through the gates of heaven. Before h... read more
23. What's a flat-earther's least favorite gun? A revolver.
24. A buddy of mine is one of those "flat Earther’s." He said he’s angry and going to the edge. I have a feeling he’ll come around.
25. Why Don't We Have a Reality Show Where Flat Earthers Walk to the End of the Earth? Because that would be edgy
26. I was in an argument with a flat Earther I told him I didn’t believe him. He said he would video himself walking to the edge of the world. He’ll come around eventually.
27. Why are the flat earthers always at the butt end of a joke? Cos all their arguments fall flat.
28. What’s the difference between a flat-earther and an anti-vaxxer? Their google searches.
29. What's a flat-earther's least favorite gun? A revolver.
30. Why do you have to use email to communicate with a flat earther? You can't reach them with fax.
31. My flat-earther friend decided to walk to the end of the world to prove it's flat! In the end, he came around.
32. A flat-earther cornered me in an elevator. He was wrong on so many levels.
33. A Flat-Earther is lost at sea when he sees a boat off in the distance then it disappears.
34. The real reason for the missing of many flat-earthers in recent weeks as suggested by their friends of similar thought The Flat Earth Society has reported that the 6 foot social distancing measures have led to the pushing of some of their members over the edge.
35. What is the difference between Q followers and flat earthers? At least the earth exists!
36. What is the real argument Flat Earthers are trying to use? 2D, or not 2D? That is the question.
37. Flat earthers are not very fond of the 2 metre distanceing They claim its pushing some of their members over the edge.
38. What is a flat earthers favorite type of bread? Flatbread
39. My friend was so convinced of flat earth, he said he was going to Antartica to find the edge. He came around eventually.
40. Flat-Earthers always change what they say about the Flat Earth for their convenience. Luckily there aren't any other groups that do that. Thank God.
41. What's a flat-earther's least favorite gun? A revolver.
42. A flat earther and a round earther were arguing When the flat earther realized he was losing the argument he starts walking away. The round earther faces the other direction and says "I'll see you around"
43. Why are there no highly credited esteemed flat-earthers? Because flattery will get you nowhere.
44. A buddy of mine is one of those "flat Earther’s." He said he’s angry and going to the edge. I have a feeling he’ll come around.
45. What is a flat earther's favorite clothing brand? Land's End
46. A flat-earther cornered me in an elevator. He was wrong on so many levels.
47. A flat-Earther died, and to his surprise found himself standing on a cloud in front of the gates of heaven A flat-Earther died, and to his surprise found himself standing on a cloud in front of the gates of heaven. God himself was there and told him he would be happy to answer any questions the man might have - about anything across the entirety of Space and Time. So of course the man said - "Was I right? Is the earth actually flat?" and God chuckled and said "Of course not". The man shook his head in disbelief, shaken to his very core, before murmuring "...this goes even higher than I thought..."
48. Did you hear about the Flat Earther who went skydiving? He landed on a plane.
49. What's the problem with Flat Earthers? They just can't seem to get a round to it.
50. Flat earthers are not very fond of the 2 metre distanceing They claim its pushing some of their members over the edge.
51. A particularly open-minded flat-earther started out on a journey, and decided he wouldn't stop traveling until he found evidence to convince him to change his worldview. And eventually he came around.
52. I just got kicked out of flat earth Facebook groups because I asked if the 6 foot social distancing had pushed anyone over the edge yet.
53. Riddle: A flat-earther and a round-earther enter a maze at the same time. They each have a compass, and both know that the exit is on the North end of the maze. Which one exits the maze first? The round-earther exits first, because the flat-earther died of measles while inside.
54. A flat earther and a round earther were arguing When the flat earther realized he was losing the argument he starts walking away. The round earther faces the other direction and says "I'll see you around"
55. Why Don't We Have a Reality Show Where Flat Earthers Walk to the End of the Earth? Because that would be edgy
56. Why don't Flat Earthers care if they're having a bad day? They're always on top of the world
57. A flat earther cornered me in an elevator. He was wrong on so many levels.
58. A flat-earther dies and goes to heaven. He arrives in heaven and is met by Saint Peter at the pearly gates. "You’ve lived your life free from sin and because of this, we welcome you into heaven my child." Says Saint Peter. The flat-Earther breathes a sigh of relief and starts to make his way through the gates of heaven. Before h... read more
59. Flat-earthers have heard their theory is spreading around the globe They don't believe it.
60. Flat earthers are very worried about the pandemic. They are afraid that social distancing measures may push people over the edge.
61. How does a Flat Earther travel the world? on a plane
62. What's the difference between a politician and a flat earther? A politician fools the people and a flat earther fools himself
63. An anti masker, An anti vaccer, A flat earther.... An anti masker, An anti vaccer, A flat earther all went to the bar... .. .. .. Now that's can't be coincidence
64. Why didn't the flat-earther accept his award at the ceremony? He didn't believe in golden globes.
65. I want to become a flat earther. But I heard that there is a learning curve.
66. I debated a flat earther once he stormed off saying he'd walk to the edge of the earth to prove me wrong. He'll come around, eventually.
67. A round earth fact to a flat-earther is… …like what thanksgiving is to a turkey
68. I invited my flat-earther friend to play basketball. I invited my flat-earther friend to play basketball. He brought a frisbee with him.
69. Why are there no highly credited esteemed flat-earthers? Because flattery will get you nowhere.
70. How do you save a flat earther who's falling? You don't because gravity doesn't exist.
71. A flat earther is shown a map of the world "Not only is this world flat as the map truly shows it to be but all the places and physical features are also fictional!" He says "Why do you think that?" Someone asks "Because in the key on the side it says everything is a legend."
72. An anti-vaxxer, a flat-earther and a holocaust denier walked into a bar but got turned down by the bartender.
73. the only thing flat earthers fear... Is sphere itself!
74. A round earth fact to a flat-earther is… …like what thanksgiving is to a turkey
75. What does a flat-earther do with a ball? He plays Frisbee!
76. Do you know how flat-earthers call 2020? Panic! At The Disc
77. we shouldn't bully flat Earthers or anti Vaxxers just because they have brain damage doesn't mean we get to make fun of them
78. How many flat earthers does it take to screw in a light bulb Trick question it’s a light disk
79. What do flat-earthers call global warming? Toast
80. A flat earther cornered me in an elevator. He was wrong on so many levels.
81. Why are the flat earthers always at the butt end of a joke? Cos all their arguments fall flat.
82. A flat-earther dies and goes to heaven. He arrives in heaven and is met by Saint Peter at the pearly gates. "You’ve lived your life free from sin and because of this, we welcome you into heaven my child." Says Saint Peter. The flat-Earther breathes a sigh of relief and starts to make his way through the gates of heaven. Before h... read more
83. Why don't Flat Earthers care if they're having a bad day? They're always on top of the world
84. What does a flat-earther do with a ball? He plays Frisbee!
85. A flat earther was asked to describe fear... They said there was nothing to fear but sphere itself.
86. A flat-earther was asked to describe fear... They said there was nothing to fear but sphere itself.
87. Why does everyone try to discredit Flat Earthers? It's like there's a global conspiracy.
88. What do flat-earthers call global warming? Toast
89. A flat-earther was asked to describe fear... They said there was nothing to fear but sphere itself.
90. The Earth is 70% uncarbonated water Therefore the Earth is flat
91. Why do flat earthers enjoy talking to flight instructors? they tell them 5G might make them sick.
92. No, flat-earthers are right. The earth is supposed to be flat. Until they burried your mom beneath it.
93. What if we tell the flat earthers that the answers they are looking for are in Area 51 Then that way we get to watch people storm Area 51 and no one dies that anyone cares about!
94. Why do Flat-Earthers enjoy the quarantine? They finally get to flatten the curve.
95. I invited my flat-earther friend to play basketball. I invited my flat-earther friend to play basketball. He brought a frisbee with him.
96. How many flat-earthers does it take to draw an arrow? None. They can't make a point.
97. A Flat-Earther is lost at sea when he sees a boat off in the distance then it disappears.
98. What would be a terrifying game show for flat-earthers? Sphere Factor
99. Flat-Earthers always change what they say about the Flat Earth for their convenience. Luckily there aren't any other groups that do that. Thank God.
100. What is the real argument Flat Earthers are trying to use? 2D, or not 2D? That is the question.
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