Top 30 Dad Jokes

Welcome to the top 30 dad jokes.

The Top 30 Dad Jokes List

These are the top 30 Dad Jokes for 2025.

1. Why did the math book look sad? Because it had too many problems.
2. I'd avoid the sushi if I were you. It's a little fishy!
3. How do you make holy water? You boil the hell out of it.
4. I was playing chess with my friend and he said, "Let's make this interesting." So we stopped playing chess.
5. What kind of music do chiropractors like? Hip pop.
6. I used to hate facial hair, but then it grew on me.
7. What do you call spiders who just got married? Newly-webs.
8. I'm starting a new dating service in Prague. It's called Czech-Mate.
9. I hated facial hair but then it grew on me.
10. What did one Dorito farmer say to the other? "Cool Ranch!"
11. I begin to read a horror novel in Braille. Something bad is about to happen, I can feel it.
12. How does a train eat? It goes chew chew.
13. I didn't get a haircut, I got them all cut.
14. How does a penguin build its house? Igloos it together.
15. Why did two tall people get along so well? The could really see eye to eye.
16. What did the flowers do when the bride walked down the aisle? They rose.
17. They say that 3/2 people are bad at fractions.
18. What's the best time to go to the dentist? Tooth-hurty.
19. Why did the scarecrow become a successful neurosurgeon? He was outstanding in his field.
20. How do you make holy water? You boil the hell out of it.
21. What rock group has four men who don't sing? Mount Rushmore.
22. Why do melons have weddings? Because they cantaloupe!
23. What do you call a pile of cats? A meow-tain.
24. I was going to tell a time-traveling joke, but you guys didn't like it.
25. You are on a horse riding full gallop. Next to you is a giraffe at full gallop, and behind you is a lion on your tail. What do you do? Get off the carousel.
26. Atheism is a non-prophet organization.
27. What does a bee use to brush its hair? A honeycomb!
28. Did you hear about the cheese factory explosion? There was nothing left but de-brie.
29. Mom texted me from the grocery store to say they're out of pasta, and we're penneless.
30. Did the photon need to check a bag? Nope, he was traveling light.

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