Top 50 Marriage Jokes

Welcome to the top 50 marriage jokes.

The Top 50 Marriage Jokes List

These are the top 50 Marriage Jokes for 2024.

1. Why did the husband bring a ladder to the wedding? Because he heard the cake was going to be tiered!
2. My wife told me to stop impersonating a flamingo. I had to put my foot down.
3. Why did the couple bring a ladder to their marriage? Because they heard the wedding vows were a high commitment!
4. Why did the bride always carry a pencil on her wedding day? Because she wanted to draw a happy marriage!
5. How do you know when you've found your soulmate? When they understand your need for sleep more than they understand your need for conversation.
6. Marriage is a relationship in which one person is always right and the other is the husband.
7. A successful marriage requires falling in love many times, always with the same person.
8. Marriage is a relationship in which one person is always right and the other is the husband.
9. A successful marriage requires falling in love many times, always with the same person.
10. Why did the married couple go to the seafood restaurant? They heard it was a great plaice for a date!
11. Why did the husband bring a ladder to the wedding? Because he heard the cake was going to be tiered!
12. Why did the couple bring a ladder to their marriage? Because they heard the wedding vows were a high commitment!
13. Why did the married man bring a ladder to the bar? Because he heard the drinks were on the house!
14. Why did the husband bring a ladder to the wedding? Because he heard the cake was going to be tiered!
15. Marriage is a relationship in which one person is always right and the other is the husband.
16. A successful marriage requires falling in love many times, always with the same person.
17. A successful marriage requires falling in love many times, always with the same person.
18. "Why did the man put his money in the blender? He wanted to make liquid assets for his divorce."
19. I asked my wife if she ever fantasizes about me. She said yes, about me taking out the trash, mowing the lawn, and doing the dishes.
20. Why did the man put his money in the blender? He wanted to make liquid assets for his divorce.
21. Why did the bride always carry a pencil on her wedding day? Because she wanted to draw a happy marriage!
22. My wife told me to stop acting like a flamingo, so I had to put my foot down.
23. Why don't scientists trust atoms? Because they make up everything, just like a marriage.
24. "Why did the man put his money in the blender? He wanted to make liquid assets for his divorce."
25. I asked my wife if she ever fantasizes about me. She said yes, about me taking out the trash, mowing the lawn, and doing the dishes.
26. I asked my wife if she ever fantasizes about me. She said yes, about me taking out the trash, mowing the lawn, and doing the dishes.
27. I told my husband he should take up meditation. He told me he was too busy to sit still.
28. My wife told me to stop acting like a flamingo, so I had to put my foot down.
29. Why don't scientists trust atoms? Because they make up everything, just like a marriage.
30. Why do married people live longer? Because they can't argue with their spouse if they're dead!
31. Marriage is all about compromise. I’ll make the coffee, and you can decide how you want it—cold or burnt!
32. Why did the married couple go to the seafood restaurant? They heard it was a great plaice for a date!
33. Love is like a fart. If you have to force it, it’s probably crap.
34. I asked my wife if she ever fantasizes about me. She said yes, about me taking out the trash, mowing the lawn, and doing the dishes.
35. A successful marriage requires falling in love many times, always with the same person.
36. Why do married people live longer? Because they can't argue with their spouse if they're dead!
37. Getting married is like going to a restaurant with friends. Everyone orders what they want, but when the bill comes, you all have to split it evenly.
38. Why did the married couple go to the seafood restaurant? They heard it was a great plaice for a date!
39. Marriage is a relationship in which one person is always right and the other is the husband.
40. Marriage is a relationship in which one person is always right and the other is the husband.
41. Why don't scientists trust atoms? Because they make up everything, just like a marriage.
42. Why did the man put his money in the blender? He wanted to make liquid assets for his divorce.
43. Why did the married couple go to the seafood restaurant? They heard it was a great plaice for a date!
44. "Why did the man put his money in the blender? He wanted to make liquid assets for his divorce."
45. I asked my wife if she ever fantasizes about me. She said yes, about me taking out the trash, mowing the lawn, and doing the dishes.
46. Why did the married couple go to the seafood restaurant? They heard it was a great plaice for a date!
47. Why did the man put his money in the blender? He wanted to make liquid assets for his divorce.
48. A successful marriage requires falling in love many times, always with the same person.
49. Why did the couple bring a ladder to their marriage? Because they heard the wedding vows were a high commitment!
50. I asked my wife if she ever fantasizes about me. She said yes, about me taking out the trash, mowing the lawn, and doing the dishes.

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